


The Time Travelling Transportation Tragedy Adventure

by F_O_R_JR



Category: The Middleman (TV), Torchwood
Genre: & a forced wiped memory of an almost rape remembered because of a rehearing of Jack's name, F/F, F/M, Gen, M/M, Multi, Other, grown by a Poison Ivy-inspired pair of supervillains, mentions of an old case between The Middleman and Torchwood, mentions of former relationship between Lacey and Trevor, release of sex inducing pollen from a byproduct of the accident caused by Ivy Ivan
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-08-08
Updated: 2016-08-08
Packaged: 2018-02-05 18:26:39
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death, Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,264
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1828009
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/F_O_R_JR/pseuds/F_O_R_JR
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Wendy Watson thought today was gonna be a "typical" Middleman day until she walked into a genuine Mexican standoff in the fake reception area for Jolly Fats Wehawkin Temp Agency A.K.A. Middleman HQ. Wendy didn't need to think about it, she fought her way through the group of people in front of her to be by the side of her boss, partner, and friend; The Middleman. "What the [BLEEP] is going on here? It is too [BLEEP] early for someone or a group of people wanting to kill us today!!!" Wendy looked up at her boss because he was standing on the reception desk and was completely shocked and disgusted when he said, "That man there. They're leader tried to rape me on a former case." Wendy slowly turned her gun's settings to the highest and said, "Oh, you [BLEEP] [BLEEP] rapist. We're gonna [BLEEP] kill you with EXTREME INTENT!!!" Just then the door behind them opened and a voice said, "WAIT!!! Hold your horses, you morons!"</p>
            </blockquote>





	The Time Travelling Transportation Tragedy Adventure

Wendy Watson thought today was gonna be a "typical" Middleman day until she walked into a genuine Mexican standoff in the fake reception area for Jolly Fats Wehawkin Temp Agency A.K.A. Middleman HQ. Wendy didn't need to think about it, she fought her way through the group of people in front of her to be by the side of her boss, partner, and friend; The Middleman. "What the **[BLEEP]** is going on here? It is too **[BLEEP]** early for someone or a group of people wanting to kill us today!!!" Wendy looked up at her boss because he was standing on the reception desk and looked completely shocked and disgusted when he said, "That man there. Their leader tried to rape me on a former case." Wendy slowly turned her gun's settings to the highest and said, "Oh, you **[BLEEP] [BLEEP]** rapist. We're gonna **[BLEEP]** kill you with **EXTREME INTENT!!!"** Just then the door behind them opened and a voice said, "WAIT!!! Hold your horses, you morons!"

 

What the **[BLEEP]** is it, Ida?" yelled the Middleman. 'WOW **,** HE CURSED!' thought Wendy and Ida at the same time. "I just found the old case file involving the names, 'Captain Jack Harkness' and 'The Torchwood Institute'. I'll only tell you all about it when this pathetic excuse for a Mexican standoff is over because I just fixed and cleaned this room last night!" "Gwen, Rex, put your guns down." "You can't be serious!" they said at the same time. "DO IT NOW!" said Jack while looking at them in turn. "Wendy, we are going to do the same." "Like hell, I am." "I am your commanding officer, Miss Watson. And I gave you a direct order," said The Middleman while staring down at Wendy who was staring up at him. "OK, FIIINE! But I'm leaving it on the highest setting it has," Wendy said while looking at Jack. The Middleman started smirking and said, "Thank you, Dubby."

 

"Now, that this Wild West show is over. How about you all shut up, calm down, and get comfortable while you listen to me read the case file." "Well, aren't you a bright ray of sunshine," said Rex. "Keep giving me that lip, boy, and I'll make sure electronically and on paper that you are officially dead, you freakish walking and talking zombie." "How does she...?" "Oi, I like her. She made Rex speechless," whispered Gwen.

 

"Well, I'm not gonna read the whole thing because I am not a vacant headed pretty boy newscaster. Just the highlights: You and Mr. Harkness over there met because each of your separate investigations overlapped and after some posturing, checking each other out through secure secret channels, you both decided to work together to solve them. The Captain was hunting an intelligent plant humanoid from an alternate future or reality (you both didn't figure out which), named Ivy Ivan Ashwood, who first got on Jack's radar in the Amazon when it attacked and destroyed illegal logging camps, hunted down hunters and smugglers then started turning them into animals and plants they made profit on with it's Evolution-Devolution Rayguns that it invented. The Middleman's case when he was still a trainee involved GREENMAN INDUSTRIES' extra dangerous experiments with crossbreeding plants, inventing instant growing adult Redwood and Evergreen trees, and a pesticide that kills bugs while also making flowers, fruits, and vegetables 10 times stronger. An electrical failure in the basement caused all of the computers to go haywire, disengaged all the security protocols, and unlocked every lock in the building. A group of 50 scientists that were working on those projects got trapped in their huge lab unit. All the coolant systems went offline so the vats filled with the pesticide, crossbred plants, and the growing formula exploded after overheating. When The Middleman and his former boss were finally able to open the double doors, they found that all of the scientists had died or been turned into human sized flowers and trees with only one surviving person. Her name was... Dr. Holly Waterson. She had been 28 years old at the time of the incident and... pregnant." Ida paused after that to skim the rest of the file for something else to say.

 

"Their cases overlapped because it was discovered that Ivy Ivan had caused what happened after making his way to America from South America devolving or evolving anyone or anything he wanted. It was on his way to China when (doesn't say how it came by this info) it heard that GREENMAN INDUSTRIES was one of the biggest plant modifying companies in North America. It HATED the fact that humans dared mess with Mother Nature's plan. After they rushed to bring Holly to the Middleman Medical Room to save her and her child. Ivy Ivan took the opportunity when they left to make a new species of people, changing the scientists into plant-human hybrids like itself and wanted to do it to the rest of the world. They became his slaves, stole equipment for Ivy Ivan's plan, and went with Ivy Ivan to China to start there. What nobody knew at the time was that Holly had developed a telepathic link of a sort with the rest of her co-workers when she was recovering from the pesticide poison in her body. The Captain had tracked down The Middleman someway and informed him that it was Ivy Ivan who had caused all that chaos and destruction. And that Ivy Ivan had made the scientists into slaves, stolen equipment, and made up a plan to take over the world. You two teamed up because Holly still needed someone to look after her, change her skin back to normal from the green it was turned into, and monitor her baby's vitals. You both went back to GI to find something or someway to track down Ivy Ivan and his new minions, when The Captain said to you that he had scanned the area and found the unique energy signature of Ivy Ivan's Ray guns but that he needed a satellite system to track him globally. And you suggested that you both go back to Middleman HQ, so that he could give the information to me to put into the HADAR and you could also scan the plant object you had previously found where Holly Waterson was in the fetal position to protect her baby."

 

"We still haven't heard the reason why MM is saying that  _ **"THIS MAN"**_ here tried to rape him?" said Wendy pointing at Jack. "You're cranky today or are you going through withdraw, Miss Mary Jane Smoking the Bear?" Ida said back. Rex and Rhys started laughing at that. Gwen was starting to get impatient. 'I thought she said she would only read the highlights from the case file,' Gwen thought irritatedly. Gwen asked politely but firmly, "Miss Ida, is the part about why Jack tried to rape... The Middleman (VERY WEIRD NAME, by the way) in the next paragraph or so?" The next thing Ida did nearly shocked the diarrhea out of Wendy and The Middleman. She slowly gave Gwen a friendly half smirk to 3/4s of a smile. "Yes, I am almost done." Wendy 's brain short-circuited. **'** **THIS FAKE ASS SURLY LIBRARIAN [BLEEP] & [BLEEP] [BLEEP] IS NICER TO A COMPLETE STRANGER THAN SHE HAS EVER BEEN TO ME!!!' **'Wowee, Ida must have found something on the HADAR about this woman, Gwen Cooper, that she really liked.' thought The Middleman. "I will flash forward alittle to after they finished their side investigations with my help and permission.

 

 


End file.
